Why mental health is important.

In times like these, where more and more people are succumbed to mental illnesses: this is the time to start the talk. We, as humans are more advanced than ever and it is safe to say that the only place left to go is the top. Science has made numerous valuable researches that help us in ways more than one. However, there is one topic in particular that no one wants to talk about; mental health.

It is now, that more and more people are getting mentally ill and yet, no one wants to talk about it. What I want to know is that, why is it considered a taboo? Why? Are they not people like us? Don’t they breathe the same air and live under the same stars are us? So, why do people make faces when they get a whiff of someone who’s suffering from a mental disease? Why do we ward it of as being satanic or labelling it as black magic?

Yes, those things very much exist. But when someone is mentally ill, it is a completely different story. This is not talking about a certain culture, but it is a problem that is very much widespread all over the world.
It’s time that we start treating others all our equal, regardless of their skin, religion, preferences or mental conditions. People need to be told that no one asks for a mental disease and when someone tells you that there depressed, don’t tell them things like: “oh, it’ll be okay” or, “don’t worry, you’re just thinking like that”. No, people don’t get to choose why they think like that. They have no control over their thoughts and therein, lies the problem. You don’t get to punish someone who’s Kleptomaniac for a crime they have no impulses over. You don’t tell a bulimic person to not be conscience of themselves, because they have a problem for a reason. It’s the things that no one asks for, but still they get it.

All I want from societies is, to raise awareness and to work towards helping these people. All of us are going through some things in our lives that no one wants to talk about. And that’s absolutely ok. You don’t have to push yourself to be perfect, even when if seems like you really need to. No one in this world is perfect, and often times, our definition of perfect varies from person to person. The person I deem perfect, may not be in your eyes ad vice versa. And, that’s totally ok! We don’t have to pretend to have the same choices as someone else, we all have our own preferences: and, that’s what makes us unique.

You don’t need to push yourself be like someone else. God made us a particular way, and we should stay like that. We were born us, and should die being us. You don’t need to think that you have, to have Gigi Hadid’s legs, just because you saw her on instagram. You never know, Gigi might not even like her legs, and here you are: thinking what it’d be like to have that. Not everything you see on the internet is true. Especially, instagram. It’s all a facade; it’s a game of filters and angles, and once you’ve got that right, boom! That’s the definition of perfect and how you should look like. But, no. You shouldn’t look like that, you’re not meant to.

So, to all of the people that are suffering from a mental disease or are insecure about the way the look, or want to be like someone else: you’re perfect just they you are. Don’t fit in where you feel like you have to. Don’t. You shouldn’t be doing anything you don’t want to. And, the next time someone tells you that mental disease is no big deal, just don’t listen. There’s so much ignorance, and it baffles me everytime. If you need help, talk to someone who can fully understand what you’re going through. Don’t give up and be strong. There is always light at the end of the tunnel. Even when that tunnel seems like a million miles long, you’ll get through it eventually. And that when you’ll look back, you’ll know what you came from. To reach your best is through going through your worst. You can never see the best, unless you’ve seen the worst in yourself.

Talk to someone.

Suicide Prevention- PK

 800-273-TALK (8255) USA

+1 (416) 408 4357 Canada, Toronto. 

116 123 NHS, UK. 

Thankyou for reading and supporting! ❤

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My reaction: Lost In Japan Shawn Mendes (Zedd Remix)

My Reaction..Zedd Remix

I’ve been listening to snippets of the Zedd Remix all over social media. Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, you name it. Originally, I was very exited about the song that they were going to do, which I thought would be an original song and not a remix. However, when I found out it was a Lost In Japan remix I completely flipped out. I absolutely love the original version of the song. It has soft beats and a fun rhythm to it, Shawn’s voice is amazing as always. If you haven’t listened to either, I strongly recommend listening to it, man I was bopping my head so much I thought I had a neck injury. It’s sweet and overall just has a very lovey-dovey vibe to it.

BUT, the Zedd remix is a COMPLETELY different story. The beats are extremely over powering and he auto tunes Shawn’s voice as if, God forbid he destroyed his vocal chords. Ahem, ahem, Post Malone. It also adds the signature beat that Zedd has in all his songs. I mean, I’ve got nothing against listening to Techo or EDM but.. it does not sit well with Shawn’s voice. It adds too much to the actual beat of the song, and well, it’s doing the utmost.

So, I never thought I’d say this but, I absoutely hated the Remix. The song is beautiful on it’s own, so listen to that over this trash. I’m so sorry Shawn, but babe this was rough. Were you drunk when you approved this?

No offence to any of the extremely defensive fans out there, chill. I’m just being honest. You’ll see what I’m talking about..

But, please go listen to the original version, you won’t be disappointed! ❤

 The Originalimage1 (1)

my darling brother.

I remember I couldn’t see you when you were born, you were born before your time. You were supposed to be small but you were a footlong. You were everything my parents hoped you would be. I wanted to see you everyday, to hold your tiny hand, and to see your beautiful eyes; but I couldn’t.

I remember so vividly— I took off my shoes, sanitised my hands and wore gloves. Heavy footsteps towards my brother lying on an incubator.

For the first time I saw this precious little human, begging for air, a machine giving it to him. It made me realise the importance of the air we take for so granted. It made me realise how selfish I am, how ungrateful. As this little human, was grateful for everything that he had. Little breathes he took so heavily. My heart ached.

I think it might have been broken a little. I couldn’t describe the feeling. Someone I love, grasping for air. No, I did feel my heart breaking. It was all real.

I couldn’t stay much longer, it hurt. I was 12, he was 17 days old. I left him. My heart broke a little.

24 hours later, you’d gone to heaven. You were free from the machines giving you life, God had other plans for you. He took you from earth, and to the place of eternal happiness. My heart broke altogether, there wasn’t a piece intact.

Happy birthday little brother, you would’ve been six years old today.

All my love Led Zeppelin.

—-

thankyou for reading ❤ xx

The forgotten beauty in our language.

This blog’s gonna be philosophical, so yeah. In times like these, where English is the universal language that every understands— other languages are getting grossly neglected. Including, mine.

I grew up watching English movies, cartoons and having an education; which primarily focuses on English. I’m ashamed to say i’m much better at english than in my own language. It isn’t something to boast, when you say “oh, i’m fluent in X language”, it doesn’t matter. Your language is your identity. And, somewhere along the way I grew out of touch.

I don’t know about other countries, but in South Asia, it’s a growing misconception that if you know English— you’re automatically more smart. It doesn’t matter what you say, it’s how you speak. Which is important, don’t get me wrong, but is also hypocritical. Bilingual people have two sides to themselves; it’s never the same with one.

More and more, i’m trying to get in touch with Urdu. Which is my language, it’s my mother tongue and i’m so proud of it. It’s such a simple and elegant language. Grateful to be bilingual. It’s easy to speak and it’s unique mixture of Arabic & Persian. I’m concentrating on my writing because that’s where I sometimes struggle, but just like English, I use similar techniques to get me through. I write my mom small notes just to get good.

It might seem weird to foreign readers but it’s pretty common in Pakistan. Hence, I wanted to revive the beauty that is my language. However, i’m part Kashmiri and I don’t know how to say a thing. Nor does my mom, so does that give me a margin? I hope so.

The note on my hand says: (roughly)

“We say other’s languages are beautiful, but we don’t know how beautiful ours is.”

PS: thankyou so much for the love on the previous post! Make up reviews are definitely what people like more. But that doesn’t stop me from doing the other things that I enjoy as much. Give me suggestions on what the next post should be!

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Thankyou for reading and supporting! Xx ❤️

90’s Grunge makeup.

I’ve been so obsessed with decades I wasn’t born into: music, fashion, and makeup. I was listening to Nirvana when Diamonds Are Forever by Sabrina Carpenter started playing. It’s a super catchy song, i’d recommend listening to it.

Grunge makeup has always been so attractive to me. I’d never think I could pull it off, but.. i’m not mad at it. It’s basically playing with cool tones and adding a pop of color.

I basically wanted to do a cool toned brown and put some blue in the centre. That’s what I had in mind and that’s what I did. I used the Morphe 35W and Urban Decay x Gwen Stafani palette. I’m sorry if you’re expecting another palette than Morphe, but it’s affordable and I don’t really use eyeshadows on a daily, so it’s stupid to splurge.

Although, I might order me some Jeffree Star goodies. I’m so excited for that, fingers crossed. I primed my eyelids with the LA Girl Pro concealer in light beige. After that, I went with a light brown, blended that and straight to the cool tone. I took that all over my crease, and packed it on my lid. I used a hint of black to darken the outer corner.

For the lower lash, I did the same. Then, I took the blue shade, Danger from the Urban Decay x Gwen Stafani palette and put it in the inner corners and 25% on the lid. Took a pencil brush and dragged it along the lower lash. I wish I had silver glitter to make it pop, but I didn’t so.

Lash Paradise in Exactic by L’oreal. I feel like it smudges after 5-6 hours and also is really messy to apply. I’m not a fan, but it gives me crazy length.. i’m torn. I’m very much on the fence. Also, didn’t use a shit tone here, so it probably looks weird. Concealer was Makeup Revolution in C5, hands down, best concealer. I should’ve gotten C4, but.. all for the sake of making it work.

Used the Sephora Pro highlighting palette in Cool, in the shade Chromosphere. It definitely gives you amazing results when used with your fingers, i’d definitely recommend. Read it here!

Finished it off with, Huda Beauty’s liquid lipstick in Flirt. It’s a very cool toned brown and went amazing with the look. If one eye in the picture looks like it has nothing on, blame the iphone camera. Also, the sunlight.

I love doing cool toned makeup, and I’d definitely incorporate some. The necklace is H&M’s and i got it off a insta store, i’ll tag them in my post. I’m ready for a grunge concert.

I literally can’t thankyou enough for reading, it motivates me to write and the fact that people from all over the world are reading makes it so amazing! Thankyou so much! Xx ❤️

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Heartbreak at 7am.

The newly painted orange sky with hints of pink, it seemed like the skies were angry. The only way to get their fury expressed was by painting itself a certain way.

Warm April morning, 7am.

They lay in peace, bodies perfectly in sync. It was God’s creation and He scared how in touch they were. Mortals weren’t supposed to be this perfect. It was as if they were made from the same atom, yet split; same heart, yet beating as one.

His golden eyes met her chocolate brown. She’d always seem to think, ‘this thing.. infront of me.. isn’t human.’ How he’d run his generous palm in her head, caressing her hair, making her shut her eyes in pure ecstasy. It was as if the angel himself had touched her. It was simply divine. She’d look at him and think, ‘i’d do anything for this man right here, infront of my eyes.’

He notices how she looks at him— the gaze of someone terribly in love. Yes, it scared him at first. It wasn’t that he wasn’t ready, but he never thought that she’d feel the same way about him. He’d picture this a thousand times, only different ways; the love of his life, laying in his arms with sunrise greeting them. Her smile made him feel like he was the only man on earth, she’d make him feel so special. How she blushed when someone mentioned him, or how her eyes light up every damn time she looks at him. The feeling never gets old. He’d do anything for her.

She looked into his ever welcoming eyes that shone brighter than any diamond, while making circles on his chest. He gulped and thought to himself, ‘it’s getting harder.’ He pushes her hand away as worry washes all over her magically sculpted face. She is a work of art. She should be in a museum. She doesn’t deserve a piece of shit like you.

“What happened?” Her honey dripped voice made it worse.

“I can’t do this anymore.” His heart stopped beating. The color from her face vanished, the life from her soul dimmed a little. She didn’t say anything, her eyes spoke for her.

“This was fun. It’s time to move on. Goodbye.” He turned so he couldn’t see her heart jump out her chest, tears filled his face; he picked up his stuff. It was real. This is real.

“Y-you can’t do this to me! I can’t live without you.” The pain in her voice was unbelievably earthshaking. He put metal chains across his heart, it took every living atom in his fibre to not go and tell her he’s an idiot. He doesn’t mean it, it’s something he has to do for her. He doesn’t know if he can live without his soul—her.

Shutting the door behind him, she breaks down hysterically crying. Screaming, yet silent. Unaware of what happened not two minutes ago. The image of him referring to her as an object was branded in her brain. She couldn’t escape the horror that was him. The beautiful horror that she loved with every thing she had. The most hated thing which she loved the most.

He put his hands on his mouth. His heart was now on the floor, scattered. The red glass spread all across the white marble. He had left his life behind, hearing her cry was something he never wanted to hear. Breaking his heart— her heart was something he’d never dreamt of. It was something so scared he could never humiliate the very thought of it. He laid lifeless. As did she.

Even in their suffering, they were terrifyingly in sync.

Thankyou so much for reading! ❤️Xx

Sephora PRO highlighter: worth it or nah?

Recently I bought another highlight. Highlighter is hands down, my favourite. I probably don’t need as many as I own, but I’m telling you, highlighter addiction is real. The glow is no joke.

As I saw it, I was completely sold. I didn’t even bother to check the inside or look at how blinding it was. The packaging made me bought it, honestly. It’s holo and it’s crazy mesmerising. I stare and play with it all the time.

The formula is a gel/creme. It has five shades and are all cool. I bought the cool toned palette because the warm was dark for me and I don’t have that many cool highlights anyways. All the more reason to buy. The shades range from clear gel, natural finish and a somewhat blinding highlight.

You can definitely lay down the gel, and then put on a powder to blind everyone in your surroundings and also the aliens on Venus. However, I didn’t use the powder on top. I was feeling natural today. Well, sort of. I started with my real techniques highlighter brush and applied the shade, chromosphere and topped it off with the clear lunar glaze.

I used the brush but I feel like fingers would work best. If you’re into super natural highlights, this is the shit for you. Highly recommend. 8/10.

But if you like blinding highlights like me, this is a cool thing to lay down and then layer with a powder. In either cases, it’s pretty good. I don’t wear foundation so it didn’t make me oily or something; but if you wear foundation on a regular, this might not be for you. If you’re like me and wear no foundation whatsoever, this is great too. And also works when you’re going for the no makeup makeup look.

It retails for 3000 RS / 29 US$. But it won’t be expensive when you buy directly from Sephora. But, because we don’t have a Sephora in Pakistan, every high end brand seems luxury. This isn’t expensive and you do get five highlighters.. so I guess it’s not bad at all. And.. I mean the packaging. *heart eyes*

I don’t know about you, but I’m swooning.

PS: I have more readers in USA, than my own country. Wow, thanks i’m moving. Hi, to all of you foreigners! ❤ thankyou. ALSO THANKYOU TO 200 FOLLOWERS ON INSTA! ❤️❤️❤️ xoxo

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Thankyou for reading loves. X ❤

Worth reading: the sun and her flowers by Rupi Kaur

I picked up ‘the sun and her flowers’ by Rupi in late September. But, I got so busy I couldn’t give it the time it deserves. I remember so many people raving about, taking aesthetically pleasing pictures all over Instagram. It was everywhere.

I had bought this after I finished and loved milk and honey with every thing I have. Her words are so pure yet not so pure at the same time. There’s this thing in Rupi’s writing that makes you read it over and over again. It feels you feel evey emotion side my side.

Her poems are incredibly mesmerising. I couldn’t even put the book down. I actually forced myself to stop after I finished two parts in nearly 25 minutes. I wanted to enjoy it more.

I let the sun peek through my enormous window, laid down on the carpet and read the poems slowly. It was some experience. I had Zayn playing on my speakers and I read through poems about self love, building yourself and all the heartache.

I loved countless poems and I can’t pick a favourite. If you don’t read poetry, or haven’t started, or are thinking of reading— do it! Poetry is so unique and intoxicating that you can’t get enough of it. I’ll definitely try and read Rumi next whenever I get the chance.

I’d highly recommend giving this a read, i’m sure you’d be impressed. If you haven’t already, of course. If you’ve already read it, tell me how you like it.

PS: sorry if this is short, but what else can you talk about for a great poetry book? it speaks for itself.

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Thankyou for reading loves. X ❤

Winters outfits—hit or miss?

Winters are probably the most fun you can have dressing up and styling outfits. But, when it comes to someone like me, who literally freezes in 18C, it’s extremely difficult. However, I do enjoy autumn and it’s one of my favourite months. I don’t really like winters or summers, I prefer the weather where you wear a light jacket and you’re good.

I don’t want to sweat my ass off and freeze until my fingers are blue. Nope, I don’t do extreme weather. Funny story, I actually had blue fingers when I was in Istanbul in January, it was legit freezing. I have no idea how I survived the cold but, i’m the shit.

I bought nearly 90% of my winter clothes from UK, when I was visting last year. I’m glad about that. I bought this wannabe icy but sort of, ultra marine blue velvet sweater from Primark. It’s so soft and cuddly it’s insane. It’s also oversized which makes it even better. It’s actually Cardiff wind approved because it makes you insanely hot. So, if it’s really cold you can just wear a jacket and you’re good to go.

Velvet sweaters are warm but also looks absolutely divine. The color shifts make them so unique and eye-catching. I bought it for 5£ / 745 RS, on sale and the next day it was for 3£. *extreme face palm*

My go-to black Old Navy jeans which I wear everyday and are my absolute necessity. I can’t do anything without them, and obviously, black is such a staple. You can’t go wrong when you’re black. I wore my Adidas Superstars in white, which are the most basic bitch shoe ever and everyone who’s eveyone has them. But, they’re cute so it’s good. Also, planning to get white trainers but i’m not sure which one. Can you tell i’m a huge sneaker fan? I don’t wear anything unless it’s a sneaker or a heel. There’s simply no in between.

I wore my I am jewellery necklace which I never get a chance to wear because I can never match it, so I paired it with this look. For my makeup, I didn’t do anything except my mascara and lipstick. Mascara is L’orèal Lash Paradise 2000 RS / 19 US$ (I know it’s not that expensive, but the taxes in Pakistan make it stupid expensive) & lipstick by Glam Girl in Metamorphosis 270 RS / 1.75 US $. It’s extremely affordable and very long lasting so I’d recommend checking it out.

Really inspired by @ohareeba on instagram, so I busted my clear neon transparent bag from the archive. It’s a neon green that I picked up from Tally Weijl in 2014. It has a really heavy metal chain which is cool and adds character. Retails for 20€ / 2700 RS.

CD- Guns n Roses Appetite For Destruction. (I feel this need to sing, ‘he loves guns n roses, guuuuns and roooooses’, but I have no one to sing that for, so i’ll let it slide. Also, if you know the song reference, you’re the shit.

I kept my wallet, phone, headphones, medicine and a small mirror in my bag, just in case. Also, my lipstick because you never know when you want to re-apply. I went shopping later on and got some amazing new pens and sticky notes from Miniso. So obsessed with their stationery, it’s cute but it also works. Win-win situation.

PS: i hope this didn’t suck. but tell me if it did, i’m ok with it, honestly.

Instagram: @opaqueblues

Thankyou for reading!! ❤ x

Am I in the wrong era?

Sometimes I think to myself, I’m in the wrong era. My fascination with old things and vintage fashion has always been there, however, there are certain times where it grows even more. Whenever I watch an old movie, listen to old music or jut think about the old times— I somehow get this euphoric sensation. I like to think I’m a old soul that’s trapped in 2018.

While I love cellphones and technology, I also crave for a time without them. The feeling of getting a letter from another continent, or maybe just another country is extremely satisfying for me. The handwritten sentiment means the world to me instead of a 500 word long text. Not every one can convey their emotions as they like, but the effort is what matters. Whenever I read history books, I feel a strange sort of empathy even though I was never a part of it. There has always been this desire for more than what was written in the history books.

I remember this one time when I went to Potsdam and visited the Sanssouci Palace (French for no worries), I felt peace. Roaming through the mesmerizing gardens looking through the perfectly sculpted statues, the architecture, it was truly my favorite. The smell of royal betrayal and gloominess was buried deep in the Palace walls. The story of Frederick the Great possibly being gay and his escape from the palace is truly fascinating. The guide told us that he had escaped with his lover who was possibly a kitchen boy, making their way to London. However, the King set his guards behind them and they managed to find them before they left Prussia, now Germany. I don’t know if it’s true or a rumor but the King actually locked Frederick into a tower and kept his lover in the opposite tower, he ordered his death and poor Frederick watched his lover die in front of him.

This story somehow gives me the chills. But, the experience was absolutely amazing and I’d definitely go back and do it all again. It’s the same with me and music. In my opinion, music was definitely way better. I mean, everyone should know at this point. Music today is just remixed and auto tuned shit. We rarely get real instruments playing in the background and only a handful of artists whose real vocals we’re familiar with. I’m not implying every artist does that but the majority do. We don’t have artists like Eric Clapton, Jimi Hendrix, Bryan Adams, Stevie Wonder anymore. I hope to God we do, for the future of music.

We don’t have artistic bands like Pink Floyd, Led Zeppelin and Queen anymore. Everyone seems to rip off each other or old music. The classic riffs made in the 70’s still shake my soul— and I’m not even from the 70’s. Maybe this is my Dad’s influence, but I’m eternally grateful for it. The essence in music back in the day was utterly magical, everyone was gifted and they crafted their skill accordingly. And, honestly can someone tell me the thrill in techno music? I’m sorry if I offend someone but it’s technically not even music. It’s just a bunch of machines playing together to make horrible sound. Yes, they may sound good four times but this isn’t the music you’ll be listening four years from now.

If you wanna listen to pure guitar, listen to Jimmy Page in No Quarter by Led Zeppelin; you’ll never be the same. Or yet, just listen to Hendrix. Now, that’s music. But still, you’ve got your own preferences and I’ll respect that.

I feel like even my fashion choices are somewhat inspired by all over the decades. 50’s is extremely minimalist and 70’s with rock and roll with a hint of ‘I don’t give a shit’—me making fashion choices. It’s crazy how much other things influence our being and by the time you know it, you’re consumed by it. Recently, I’m collecting CD’s. My dad has a huge collection of CD’s, Vinyls, Cassettes you name it. There probably isn’t one artist that he isn’t familiar with. I’ve got many of my favorites from his collection, Nirvana, Black Sabbath, U2, Justin Timberlake, among others. My dad was adamant I wouldn’t take his Led Zeppelin CD’s but, I still did because they’re my favorite band, ever. I still bug my dad all the time to tell me about his time growing up because he grew up in probably the most artistic era ever. I’m pretty sure he secretly enjoys telling me all about it just as much as I love listening to it.

The CD’s in the picture are;

Led Zeppelin: Latter Days Greatest Hits Vol2

Nirvana MTV Unplugged

Queen Greatest Hits

Nirvana Nevermind

I’ve been so busy studying these past weeks and hence couldn’t blog consistently, but I guess it’s just gonna get busier from here. I have my mocks in December, which I’m absolutely dreading. I mean, it’s a lot. Slowly but surely it’s gonna work out, I hope so.

PS: I WATCHED BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY AND I ABSOLUTELY LOVE IT AND I WANNA WATCH IT AGAIN!! ❤ Rami did a magnificent job as Freddie and i’m sure he’s looking down and slow clapping in utter happiness. I also cried at the ‘We Are The Champions’ closing performance. It was such an amazing movie, a must watch if you’re a fan of Queen. (I’m sorta sad that Under Pressure didn’t have a full stage time tho </3)

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Thank you for reading! X ❤

Are mukbangs really fun?

Mukbangs are when you eat infront of a camera while talking and that’s what people find fun to watch. Well, that’s my knowledge on what a Mukbang is. I wasn’t eating infront of a camera nor was I alone.

I had the most fun sleepover with my cousin and it was a total blast. Like those sleepovers which you plan and they go accordingly, to the best of it’s extent. Yeah, it was insanely fun. We were watching the Jeffree Star and Trisha Paytas’ Mukbang, while my cousin goes, “Let’s just order McDonalds,” and I look at her with utter excitement and a nod of approval. Because in that moment, I was thinking the exact thing.

Called McDonalds and ordered two boxes of Spicy Chicken with large cokes and large fries. Talk about eating unhealthy. We devoured our chicken while gossiping about spicy stuff and reminiscing about the good old days. We talked about how great One Direction used to be and how we stayed up fangirling and listening to their albums’ all night. We played old songs that we’d listen to and shout out each and every single lyric.

It’s so fun when you have someone you can talk to about whatever and just chill. That’s exactly what we did. We jammed out to music and ate our delicious food side by side. This for me, was so much more fun that watching another person eat.

Actually funny story, I applied the Huda Beauty liquid lipstick in Medusa, and the delivery guy thought I was some sort of psycho. It’s so much fun when you wear a gothic color in public and everyone just stares at how crazy you look. I actually feel so cool whenever I wear weird and obnoxious colors. I feel like a bad bitch and no one should talk to me, I’m telling you there’s something about it that makes me feel like a dangerous womaaan. Woah, Ariana reference.

Let’s just pretend I’m an emo jamming out to Guns N Roses and I’m a skater girl who wears black clothes all year. Can I be that cool? If you’re an emo, can we be friends?

Also, holyshit.. I should spend a day as a Goth. Like, the full experience. THAT WOULD BE SO MUCH FUN! Hit me up, if you know how to do that.

So, going back; Although we didn’t order much, mukbangs are extremely fun. You should definitely do one with someone whose company you enjoy. Here’s to many more mukbangs.

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Thankyou for reading loves. X ❤️

Yellow withered roses in the midsummer rain.

She got yellow roses for him, wondering if he’d take them. Yellow; it represents the bond of friendship, the connection between two people, with similar souls and different bodies. Was this not the concept of soulmates?

She had wondered on different occasions if he was, infact, her soulmate. Fantasising about eternal love was what kept her up at night, it was that which taught her to forgive him; even when he’d upset her the most. When she’d see him with other girls—dancing to the song that she hoped they’d dance to, her waist aching for his gentle and safe touch; which was given to them.

“I’ll lose him if I don’t tell him,” she thought to herself. “You’ll lose him either way, sweetheart” whispered the pessimistic organ in her head. There she set out, wearing her best dress and the yellow roses in her hands. She knocked aggressively just as the heart inside her ribcage. Her eyes recognised him as one, she held out the roses and without any hesitation; “I love you.”

And there he stood, awestruck. It was as if he’d seen his mother die for the second time; the look she remembered way too well. He couldn’t manage to say the words but his eyes told every single emotion he was feeling, she had known him all her life. “I-I… I,”

And in that moment, she knew she had gotten her answer. It was as if, someone had her voodoo doll in their hand and sticking needles into her heart. The pain was uncontrollable, she had forgotten to breath. The sweet and salty mid summer rain fell on her face, as she grew blue by the second. She had forgotten to breathe, she didn’t have the will to take in the oxygen and the fresh earthy smell.

“This was supposed to be my time!” She cried out to the skies above; they raged with lightning, signifying their mourning for her unrequited love. Those precious yellow roses, that she bought with all the love that was beating in her heart, are now withered in the midsummer rain—along with her newly damaged heart.

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Thankyou for reading loves. X❤️